ARTICLE - The Impact of Disconnected Beauty
Wednesday, October 19th, 2011A good laugh at the insanity of how we define and design our marriages is surely in order. It’s not as funny as it should be though because so many people are affected by the enormous amount of emotional suffering. Women give up on men, and men give up on women after failed attempts at relating, and both are left feeling misunderstood and unappreciated. Why do we keep hitting our heads against the wall with this marriage stuff? Instead of continuing to do the same thing expecting a different outcome, let’s take a deeper look at the aspect of a woman’s inner beauty or disconnection to it that creates disharmony in relationships.
What we need to know about women is that they are very disconnected to their inner beauty and sexuality which makes them feel inadequate and unhappy overall in their lives, and especially in relationships with men. A shocking 80% of women do not have a good body image, and 97% do not like something about their bodies. Below is an excerpt from an indepth study of college-age students on women’s body image published in “The Qualitative Report” in June, 2009.
-Beyond an awareness of their bodies, our participants learned a particular set of attitudes regarding women’s bodies, and not one participant was currently satisfied with her body as it was. Moreover, our female participants all thought, to varying degrees, that a “better body” (one closer to the cultural standard) would make them happier and/or more successful. In our written interviews we asked all of the male and female participants the following question: “Honestly, if you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?” All of the female participants listed a body part, their weight, or their body image. In a follow-up question asking why, the following responses were given: envy other women, to gain confidence, to get boys, to get better clothes, due to self-consciousness, currently feels unattractive or otherwise dissatisfied with appearance, and as a result of cultural influence.-
Adding insult to injury, Americans alone spend over 200 billion dollars each year on beauty products and services without an ounce of difference in how content or satisfied women feel in their lives. This same amount of money would be enough to feed, clothe, educate, and provide health care for every child in the world. (Worldwatch Institute) How happy would women AND men be if that were a reality?!?
A resulting dynamic of unhappy women in our relationships is a little startling. Men are often the receivers of the rath of unhappy women. In countless Jerry Springer shows, a disgruntled wife or girlfriend is allowed to use her spouse or boyfriend as a punching bag, unleashing as much anger as is physically possible without any response whatsoever from the men. Sometimes the abuse is not so overtly physical, but statements of blame like “I am done with men.,” “He is so clueless!,” or “What a piece of work he is!”
Men need our guidance, love and understanding to navigate the waters of our emotions, especially with our body images.
Call to action…DABS everyday!
Deep breath
Act from love
Be kind
Smile alot 
