FINDING THE FUNNY – Do You Know Me?
A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial–a grandmotherly, elderly woman.
He approached her and said, "Do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Jones. I've known you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you the the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. I used to baby-sit him for his parents. And he, too, has been a real disppointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problems. The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one the shoddiest in the entire state. Yes I know him."
At this point the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail for contempt within 5 minutes."
Tags: jokes
Well, blast me with a cardboard crapwhistle! I love it! Thanks for the kick start, Betty, and the gift of wisdom. I’ve come to realize, through you and others, how valuable a tonic humor is for whatever may ail a person. And, blended gracefully with the subtle imagery that only language and the summoned mind can evoke, it is an effective potion indeed! Here’s to mitigating the angst of human failing.
We can not take life too seriously. Laughter, sex, music, dance…these are healing powers we carry with us wherever we go. Glad to inspire you!